I don't recall. (memories)

when I get a chance,
I should write that down.
I'll WANT to forget it.
There's something about these
mental images I get.
For some reason,
I prefer to keep my head
tilted,....
slightly,.....
Forward!
What's the point of turning around all the time?
King for a day
In your mind
A different everything!
Did you hear me?
Name it! Get that check list out.
I Understand & Embrace the Love that
was exchanged.
You can quote me on that.

"He'll Rue the Day",
Sorry, that ship has sailed.
It was unable to move past certain,
"Moveable" objects, & therefore
suffered a massive blow to it's hull.
It's been limping around
out there for years.
No,...no word yet.
I think it got stuck,
in the mud,
in a rut.

Have you done your Push Ups?
Yes, but a healthy body
does not a mind make.
We'll you took the cake.
While you were out, the future called,
was wondering why you haven't returned
the call.
Told 'em I would give you the message,
point you in the right direction,
but weren't sure if
you could hear me.

...and the Reds go Marching On, On, On!

well, the boys came through. I always used to say 1-nil works for me. Man, we defended like Lions. We are headed to Moscow for the Final 5/21. I will be taking a half day. We gotta do this one live, do it right. I'm already a bucket of nerves, meltdowns and fun will be had by all. Food and drinks will be provided for anyone in the Lexington Area. (Richmond included). Are there any last minute Millionaires out there who wouldn't mind making a young man's dream come true?

Who we goin' play?
We'll know today.
European Kings
was once a dream,
now closer to reality
hopefully a Victory.

Introducing someone other than myself.

Hello Class, I hope all are well on this freezing Tuesday morning. Quickly, I'm not going to be able to have class this morning due to a bout of the "Anticipatory Blues". In my mind, I'm flying to Manchester for the 2nd leg of the UEFA CL semi. I just can't focus on anything. (Please, please, please). I have however put the word out, and someone, not sure who, is going to fill in for me. Possibly a friend or family member. Thanks for understanding. Cheers!


UUhhh, Hi!
Name's Brady Chula, was asked to fill in for my Uncle Jesse. Well, someone was asked, but I'm not getting into much today, seeing as I'm 1, I don't have much going on.

I guess I should introduce myself better, sorry, that was rude. I'm supposed to be working on my manners. So, ya. Again, you can call me Brady, or Brady Lane. I'm 1, uuhh, my hobbies and interests include, but are not limited to, eating, playing, napping, I also enjoy getting tucked in, and have recently discovered hitting, quite enjoy that. I hang out with Mom and Dad a lot, I know, kind of lame. Always with your parents, but figured I would live off them for maybe 17 or 18 more years. Free rent. I think we're "getting" a new place soon, so that's cool. Some nice people are making it for us. I don't even think Dad has to trade them anything.

Uncle Jesse asked me to share a picture or 2 just so you could get to know me. He's pretty much the coolest guy around. Keeps telling me he's going to teach me Soccer, can't wait. I bet he was really good. He said I have to wait til I get a little older though. Let me tell you one thing, this whole age thing is overrated. No one should question my ability to kick or throw a ball, I mean it's pretty much what I do all day long. I get a lot of practice. Problem is, I often fall down, haven't mastered that balance thing yet, but getting there. Anyways, I ramble, I know, got that from my Uncle. Here is, well, me. Doing what I do,...breaking Hearts.

Ya, know, one thing I never understand about adults is this whole stress thing. What could everyone possibly have to worry about? I mean life is so easy. Wake up, eat, play, nap, eat, play, eat, sleep. Geez, don't see what all the fuss is about. I have plenty to keep me occupied. I have 3 crazy sisters, little do they know that I'm planning on getting them good one day soon. I'll show them. I also like to mess with our dog Max. He stinks pretty bad. One time I even put him in my stroller and tried to push him out the door, he just sat there and stared at me. Stupid dog.

Where did that pacifier ever get to? Well I'm getting hungry and tired. I think I need someone to change my diaper. This was fun. Remember that us babies are pretty much the cutest guys around. Give us a lot of Love. Watch over us, so we don't eat Caterpillars.

tough, tough week

slip slidin' away! (my feelings on the day)

imagine a thousand, no 10,000 dark-gray, ghoul-like creatures with the blood of children dripping from their razor sharp teeth pulling you back down into a dark, thoughtless, feeling-less, numb, abyss. Once you get down there, because let's face it, there's no escaping their grasp, you're injected with a razor sharp needle the size and width of a jumbo black magic marker. In this injection is a nauseating, vile substance that penetrates your Cerebral Cortex and stings your Temporal Lobe. The Temporal Lobe is a section of the brain that is associated with perception and recognition of auditory stimuli, memory, and speech. These ghouls are well read in the art of torture, they know their stuff. The drug forces your mind to focus on the sum of every childhood memory of scorn, ridicule, manipulation and pain. Teen angst included. Soon, the drug turns into a sharp, biting physical pain. Survivors have described it as a full body migraine mixed with the peeling off of all your toe nails at once. In your mind, you're totally exposed. Your deepest, darkest secrets, the ones that not even you want to recall, are out in the open like those dreams you have when you're naked and walk into a room of strangers. Sitting front row in this experience are your worst enemies. They are benefiting from your pain like a heroin addicts vein. Nothing is sacred, safe, or secret to you anymore. All you hold dear has blown away like the ashes of your closest loved ones thrown over a towering cliff. You've tried successfully to Rise Up!, but to no avail. You've given everything, you've immersed yourself.

Is your demise imminent?
Are these feelings permanent?
Untie that rope,
there'll be hope.

group consensus and cigarettes.

oh those detestable little buggers. Class, don't start. They'll just stink up your life and annoy other people around you. That said a few of the peeps, myself included checked out the Okkervil River show last night in Covington. Really cool, little, dingy, shady rock club just this side of the,...well,..river. (no pun intended). Nothing too substantial to report. The music was raw and full of energy and the company top notch. So, enjoyable night overall except the "dodgy" drive home. I think I was approaching hour 21 of being awake by the time head hit pillow. Eyes heavy like the fresh snow on a limbering tree branch, (not sure if that worked or not) I finally found my peace near 3 am. All is well now, no worries.

I always remember how much I love live music, standing there, not being able to breathe clearly, the 2 drunkest guys in the club jumping wildly right next to me. I'm a magnet for those kind of people. We all are, aren't we? I guess in the end, that's what makes the experience memorable. 3 day weekends are a gift from God, so without further ado, I'll get started on God's gift and leave you with a thought or 2 on the great shut-eye. Cheers! Lot's to do.

feelings of sleep
around the same time each night
I search for a peace, a closing.
Will those final words
bury my mind in the sand?
This is a constant I
cannot live without living with.
Close your eyes and
sink through your head.
Remember that you realized something,
but now it doesn't matter.
It was honey, & warmth &
a state of being.
Sink inside yourself,
will this Serenity last?

buy this:

It's 15 past 1 a.m.
I've fallen asleep on the couch again.
I awake to flashes of Black & White light,
same damn situation, different night.
That electric tub of lard serves it's purpose
but it won't stop telling me what to purchase.
It's true that the weak minded are easily swayed
"If you buy now, you'll get a free 6 Inch Blade".

Fly by nights,
get a life!
leave me alone,
stop being a drone.
I've told you before,
you're like a whore
who just won't stop
til she gets laid.
You'll never get paid
by me, don't worry
you're small fish in this Industry.

Should I go on? You know the drill.
Ad's, commercials, sales, Shit! What a Pill,
that I'm not going to swallow
you know I'd rather wallow.

Neon signs, rebates, guarantees
$$$$$ signs is all they see.
Am I involved in this hypocrisy?
or is it a conspiracy
to the mind and of our time
someones always reaching for one more dime.

what happened to a sense of community?
It's dying because everyone wants your money.
Oh go on! Sue me!
Frivolous lawsuits are common place
there's never a worry to save face
Because money takes all the pain away
"In the News today,
Greed took a big hit".
I don't know, people said
they were sick of it!

good morning class. that was from the mind of an oft-jaded young man trying to find his place, purpose, and paycheck in this clouded, muddled society we live in. don't feel blue, feel happy because you're alive and have a mind to think about things. Class, you all are going to do great things today, I can feel it!

Oh, and been meaning to get back to you, "Lennie":
You are (were) weak!
Remember that one time I said a few words about you
and your steaming pile of sidekick?
You tucked your tail between your legs and ran
far, far away. Like that girl in Forrest Gump who
wanted to be a bird. My words weren't that powerful,
were they?

Stand up and hear me!
This is the nail in the
coffin of your Identity.
It's being sealed with my Victory.
I'll soon be published and famous
while your famished and a lame-ass!
these quips aside, I had a ball,
you remind me of my sister-in-law.

(class, that was how to deal with a mean bully: write a poem about them)
teach.

Come On United!!

OK, Class, For today's assignment I'm going to need 2 things. Please go ahead and put the construction paper away............ Thank You. OK, On or around 2:45 Eastern time we're going to, as a class, send some positive vibes to Barcelona, Spain. The Manchester United Football Club will be there playing the 1st of a 2 leg UEFA Champions League semi-final. Very Important that we at least get an away goal. For those of you who watched the Liverpool/Chelsea game yesterday, please no own goals in stoppage time. Come on, visualize it! Thanks. OK, Well that's the assignment. Good Luck!

The following came to me whilst suffering a nasty, nasty migrane last weekend. I suppose it's a culmination of books I've read, documentaries I've watched, and dreams I've had.

A Red Mist Comes Over the Eyes Occasionaly

we took the train to the middle of the town square,
there were men on horses awaiting us there.
Once the group got large enough, we all started to sing,
some were drunk, some were loud, my ears started to ring.
You don't realize the power of a crowd in unision,
around the corner came a group of 50, they started in.
"It's about to kick off", someone informed me,
not for me! I said, ducking away shyly.
Suddenly a bottle shattered close by,
it was filled with piss that splashed warm on my thigh.
A red mist came over my eyes,
I'll make sure whoever threw that dies.
Let me outta this cage I'm in,
I'm filling up with a rage that's consumin'
I'm no longer here for the sport,
I'm only hoping Peace will abort.
Senses heightened, Animalistic qualities,
I'll fight any man, don't care what size he is.
This is a war I was born for,
when it's over, I'll be wantin' more.
This violence is the national disease,
soon silence will fill my world with ease.


Well, there ya have it. My flirtation with something other than being a good, upstanding citizen. Time to go.

Jesse

I gotta get outta here.

Ya, rockin' the brown shoes, green socks, black pants and navy sweater today again. Gettin' my mis-match on. You know how we do. Listen up trickstas, I thought I told ya.

O.K, anyways, enough of that. Oh ya, I've decided to call you guys "Class". As in,

Class, Excuse me, Class! Listen up. Um, Quiet Please. Ryan Phillips, If I have to tell you one more time to stop,..I'm going to,... What did you say to me? Stephaine Wilkinson turn that Phone off. I swear, do you guys even want to learn? Please turn your Poetry books to page,......

Things of that nature.

We'll see.

So I'm finishing up On The Road and have been getting this overwhelming feeling to flee the premises. Man that R.Kelly was brilliant. What was it that he said? "Spread your wings and fly away". What a great man, poet, visionary. Vacate this area my man. Clear my head. Tired of working for the man. Here we go, you know a poem is coming. Once I start, I can't stop. Trying to keep my head above the water, stay a float. Dean (Moriarty) minus the drugs, you're my hero for your individualism and ultimate pursuit of total freedom. I'll never be as brave as you. Sal Paradise, you man you. He went to such great lengths to be inspired for his art. Well, maybe. I don't know. Maybe he was just trying to get his kicks, we'll see, I haven't finished yet. O.K. Class is almost over, but before I dismiss please read this and discuss with a total starnger sometime today. That's all for homework. And remember, I will dismiss you, not the bell.


*help me keep my mind occupied*

I've never sought to impress with comedies
wouldn't they just turn out to be tragedies,
or maladies?
how different are the poets in hip hop
from indie rock?
I thought it was Art in the form of a spot
to the imagination
Are those the thoughts of our Nation?
or are we too consumed with inflation?
this won't reach the masses,
folks worry about the price that gas is.
Poets, Writers, Artists, Muscians not
Criminals, Cheaters, Liars & Politicians
should occupy the slot, during the 6 o'clock.

Is a healthy mind
worth the time
it takes, to recognize
the difference it makes
to our daily grind
to be inspired
and not conspired against
by certain white men
in our government?

I hope these words ring true.
It's seldom that they're few
& far between, one day
I'll know what they mean.

Well,...Hell, I said to myself.

I left my RV the other day needin' to go down to that there target store there to get me some tooth paste. That's all I needed. Nothin' else. Usually folks try t'get me to buy somethin' else, but I resist. Well anuways, after steppin'outta my RV I said, "Well,..Hell. That there's a spaceship. (I'm glad my Uncle LeRoy taught me how t'spit) After seein' that there spaceship, then I saw me a few of them aliuns comin' outta that spaceship. Soon after seein' that there spaceship, and aliuns, I reckin' I saw some sorta landin' pad or launchin' pad or sumthin'. I even got pictures to prove it. well anuways, I was thinkin' that I'd give ole Dwayne Coffee (like the drink) a call down there in Berea'r. He's always havin' those far fetched dreams where he's predictin' things n'such. I'll tell you what though, One thing about old Dwayne, is he'll never forget'chur birthday if'in ya tell him once. He'll always know. (I wonder how them folks's'doing down there in Union City?) Anuways, I finally did get my tooth paste and was walkin' back to the RV, and did see ole Bruner standin' out back at the Logan's Steakhouse. I knew him from him bein' and old fishin' buddy a'mine. One thing I noticed though was folks been gettin' in the habit a'drivin' around in big ole cars, room enough for a full size family a'eight, but they all by themselves. It just looks funny. Strange things been happenin' round these parts for quite some time now. after'n all that I s'walking back to the RV and one of them aliuns had pooped on a nice little tree and turned it purple. Can you believe that? Your poop makin' a tree turn purple. Who's ever heard a'that. Well, anuways, me being a man of my word, I spose i'll let yuns see these her pictures I took of all these strange happenin's.
This here our new fangled RV

If'n ya wouldn't believe it,...a Spaceship

a front view of that there Spaceship

that there landin' pad, r'launchin' pad or sumthin'

the strangest thing I ever did see, this here where them aliuns pooped on a tree and turned it purple

Whelp! ya'll know me to be an honest man, I wouldn't lie bout nothing. I thhink its got everything to do with them yung folks playin' their loud rock and roll music. that devil music brings bad things around with it. Hell, I dunno.

some stuff from the 80's that I remember.

was planning on sleeping in a little this morning when suddenly, and at a very early hour I was awoke(n)? by a strange noise. No, this wasn't your normal hustle and bustle of living in government housing, which I do, but I recognized this noise. Very creepy, and very distinct. (hoo-gity, boo-gity) That wasn't the noise I heard, just the noise I remember making to myself, the first time I heard the noise circa, probably 1987. That's a long and painful story so I won't get into it. Let's not dig up old graves. (get to the point!) OK,OK,..without a doubt, I knew I was hearing for the second time ever the distinct mating call of what's known in the Scientific world as, Grevy's Scimitar-horned Rufous Kori bustard Meerkat, (not to be confused with Grevy's Himitar-scaled Nori Peercat) also known as Samuel 13. Samuel 13 is, how do I explain, maybe just a little misunderstood. Samuel 13 was first brought over from Africa (unknown) in 1947 on the shipping vessel Aston Villa. Living in mostly dark alleys in large cities, off of discarded Cigar butts, Samuel 13 has miraculously survived for over 60 years. The amazing thing about Samuel 13 is that he has never before been photographed (until today). I have proof that this amazingly resilient creature exists, and is quite healthy and still looking for a mate. Now, don't be discouraged if at first you can't see him. You do have to look very closely. Trust me , he is there, I would never forget that sound. Remember we have a history.

Told ya, look even the residents are hearing it, and getting quite scared if I may say so myself. What you can't see in this picture is this guy's dog having a meltdown.

what do people do when they are scared? They hide. Look closely at the arrow. Dude freaked. They're scared, but I know better.

what else can I say?
Also, remember those weight loss commercials from the 80's where people would stand in pants, suck in their guts and look to have lost like 40 pounds? Do they still do that? Can't remember seeing any of those recently. A very interesting concept.

Some of the success I'm likely to receive from these thoughts and discoveries today should be credited to the band Tokyo Police Club. Thanks! A colleague once told me that they have a sound filled with a sense of urgency that makes them sound, well, Urgent! Cheers for that.

See the ruins of the old world below
That's what our ancestors left us.
Our robot masters will know
How to clean this mess up
And build a better world
For man and machine alike
For the boys and the girls
Who are slaves building spaceships at night
In the fluorescent light.
That's 2009.

ways to pass the time.

alone on a friday night can be,...well,...lonely. but it's good that I have high-priced friends.
now we've met.

easy now,..


forgot to mention the brilliance of David Gordon Green's Snow Angels. What a film. An honest look into the lives of a set of people in a semi-small town in America. Nothing more than a clear and concise drama. There was absolutely no fat on this film. See it.bye,bye

jchu

today I committed myspace suicide.

Thanks for the overwhelming response to yesterdays post. The answer sheets are flooding in (still) as we speak. Don't hold your breath though. The sheets are going to be forwarded on to a corporate statistical analysis center in Chesapeake, Iowa. (home of the Sooners, Go big Purple!) Results will be compiled and market research will be included into the study to help determine a more concise conclusion to our little project here. Please due allow 6-8 weeks for results. Feel free to Fax any additional completed answer sheets to 1-877-732-4365. Thanks again!

Oh ya, I exist no more on the social networking mega-giant site that is known as myspace. I lost sight of the point. thoughts were muddled, things were said, (in the heat of the moment, mind you). I couldn't see a resolution in sight, so I was forced to terminate the relationship. Hopefully I'll be able to recover some records that were left, but no word yet. Cheers to the weekend. Maybe I'll right ya another Poem.


Someone (The Smiths) told me that:
The Queen is Dead (Take Me Back To Dear Old Blighty)

shiny new shoes, campbell soup.

God save me from this mess. O.k. I wanna try to come up with a name to call all 7 of you. Like Adams calls his peeps Foggy, any suggestions? I'm no dictator! Simply pull out a sharpened No. 2 Pencil and completely fill in the circle next to your desired choice. Please make sure to "completely" bubble in your answer and please do try to avoid any, "imperial entanglements" (eraser marks). (you may circle more than one answer, if you see fit, or are just really indecisive)

0-gang
0-madness
0-believers
0-suckers
0-mertle
0-Harvey Keitel circa 1973
0-sunshine
0-vegetables
0-starship omega 579-ex234
0-the comma crew
0-young gun owners of the south
0-other (PLEASE PROVIDE NAME IN BLANK SPACE PROVIDED. Turn in paper before leaving class and have a great and safe summer vacation).


mmmm, we'll see what happens. Can I leave you with another thought before I part? I know I've been ramming the old words down your throat recently, but you might find this one funny. Everyone can, and should be able to relate to this one. Haven't we all been there before? Listen to a lot of good music today because life is very short and tomorrow you could get the Plague and die. Wouldn't it be crappy if you spent your last day on earth listening to suckie music? Here it go,.........

I've got Gas like a Wet River Dog Place!

This can be said when,
The night before you weren't using your head.
What was that I ate?
What is that smell that I hate?
What does that mean, you say
haven't you thought to just use a play
on words, this very well
may lead to turds.
big ones!
there's no need for puns,
this time I'll explain
flatulence, well didn't it
make sense? It can remind
the soul of a wet K9, whose dined
Of course I'm referring to mine
sometimes in our time of need
to expel that gas is nary a good deed.

Uh! Again,...that smell.

wake up!

I spent a lot of time dreading
the day today,
how far apart are
those 2 we once knew?
No, i've not forgotten,
just surprised you didn't
drop in.
I'm not shifting the blame,
we're both stars in this
agreed upon game.
blow the dust off that yearbook,
memories won't replace
that hurtful look.
Besides, neither one of
us realizes the extent
of my selfish devices.
Can I complete this Poem
before the towels' thrown in?
clear your mind,
this commitment will
run its course.
the source of a divorce
only contains remorse.
the medicine's startin' to take
we're runnin' outta time
before the detonation,
i'll run out of
ways to rhyme.
so here we stand,
this is gettin' epic,
separate and as 1,
it's like paying customers
demanding a refund.
I've made up my mind,
i'm stickin' with this,
the director's casted me
to play the part of Atticus.
Remember he was the hero
who had to go solo,
who took the pain,
he stayed in the game,
past decisions can be so lame!
People listen to this verse:
It's not gospel or a curse.
It's the Son of a Man
He's trying to take a stand,
cry, hurt, feel,
but hear my command.
Whose goin' watch you cry?
Who'll be there in the end?
What's the difference between
Sex&Love,?A Friend!
Remember, in your attempts
to hold onto your pride,
heed this thought,
will the grass show
greener on the other side?

I am man, hear me whimper!

before we begin, a few alternate titles for this post that I was going to use.

I'm a Ninja in my Malibu

Wanker of the Century.

In no way can I feel my hands.

Did you know it's possible to jump your own car with your own car?

I'll meet you at the Speedway, 7:05am, bring work clothes, we'll have a jog.

True story.
For those of you not located in the great commonwealth (not state) of Kentucky, we are still enjoying low 30's in the morning. The 96 Chevy Blazer, or "ice-box", is still limping around on one leg maybe once or twice a week. Bloc Party warned us, "the price of gas keeps on rising", so Ang and I still carpool 80% of the time. On the odd day however, I'll brave the freezing conditions and fight the morning grind with no heat. This morning was one of those days. "Start that beast up!", I said to myself. I soon noticed there was a good bit of frost obstructing my view of the road, so before I pulled out, I must clear it off I thought. What did I have at my beckon call to scrape the ice off you ask? Well the button to my jean jacket, but of course. Minutes later at the gas station I soon remember my exploits from a few months ago when I hadn't driven the ice-box in a few weeks and it wouldn't start back up after getting gas. Oh No!, I thought. Is this bucket of frustration going to start back up? Nope! Roger Miller couldn't have said it better: Chug-a-lug, Chug-a-lug. Nothing. O.K, O.K, I thought, it just needs a jump. No prob, lemme walk in (holy crap its cold) and see if someone can lend me a hand."Sure, I'll be right out", says the friendly Speedway employee. Seconds later he sees, or senses danger. Maybe his Spidey-sense went off. "We're actually not allowed to give jumps to customers, Sorry, It's a liability thing". What!, I'm thinking. Before I can get a word out he's back in the warm confines of his 99 cent coffee and lottery tickets. Screw this, I'll do it myself. I quickly realize I'm only an 8th of a mile or so from where I live. There sits, warm as it's name, my '05 Malibu ready to break hearts. I'm up for it, so I decide to jog home, run up the stairs (3 flights), grab our one copy of the key we have (thanks Motorvation), run back down, start it up, scrape the ice off, drive back to the Speedway, jump it, (it worked HA HA! victory), drive the Malibu back home, run up stairs, drop off key, run back down, jog 8th of mile back to Speedway where ice-box sits cold and alone, but running, head to work sitting on freezing cold ice hands,...and that my friends is where the story ends. (Whewww!!) As far as that wanker-worker guy. Well, shame on you. Although, Thank You. I'll remember to not be (pardon the pun) as cold as you were when a fellow human being is in need. What have we learned here today gang? Well that's up to you. Maybe I've learned to get the heat fixed in my car, but until that happens. I guess we could all try a little harder to help each other out. Peace, I'm out. Gotta go do something.

listening to right now: Undo by Bjork

JChu

even Superman wished ang happy b-day!

well, well, well. we find ourselves in the midst of a monumental meltdown. Angela turns the not-so-big 2-6er today. You my friend are slip-sliding your 20's away, and there ain't nothing you can do about it. What's next you ask? Besides really thick glasses, a hip replacement, and a walker, well not much. I myself gained a lot of intelligence when I turned 26. Let's see if you can follow suit. Don't feel bad,, there are a lot of 1982'ers that have already made millions. Not that I did any research or anything, but here are a few off the top of my head,....
Jessica Biel
Kelly Clarkson
Kirsten Dunst (big Radiohead fan)
Elisha Cuthbert
Seth Rogen
Anna Paquin
LeAnn Rimes
Christopher Dong (don't know who this is, but his last name is Dong, huh huh)
Anne Hathaway
Ben Roethlisberger
Kat Von D
Jonathan Jackson
Tara Lipinski
Apolo Anton Ohno (he's fast)
Ne-Yo (brilliant)
Joanna Newsom
Andy Roddick
Tony Parker
Amare Stoudemire
Dwayne Wade
Lil' Wayne (also brilliant)
Prince William (shoulda married him)

So like I said, no reason to feel bad, you're doing just fine. Lot's of love b-dog. See ya around the house, maybe we can watch a very special birthday soccer game today. Wouldn't that be fun? I'll leave ya with the single most brilliant rendition of happy birthday ever recorded ever. Cheers! (oh ya, don't worry about that rash, it'll clear up.)

and that's when the feeling ends. (the blueprint)

on riding the wave:

(i'll tell you what I told him, or what he told me)Ccccrack!
that sound you just heard
was the opening of a large can of worms
what stresses me out, you ask? Everything!
Relationships, stress, work,
money, life, family, noise,
nothing really,..No really.
this isn't a rant, we look
to the stars, and they look
to the bars. can they feel
what we feel? He said you have
to be crazy to do this,
I knew something was a miss.
My mind hasn't been fined
until I dine tonight,
let's not fight.
I also refuse to be
a fool dancing on those strings
held by life. I'll hold them
myself. We aren't fools.
Will told me we're all full
of "Fictions and F***ing addictions",
It looks cooler with the stars,
doesn't it. To me, it didn't
make any sense.
my time, like a fine wine
has elapsed, so I'll halt
before I collapse.
breathe, run, punch, relax,
jump, scream, lay down,
but don't resist.

the worst business idea in the history of business ideas.

before we discuss that, a PSA: Thursday! Spread your filthy wings & fly, have a violent crash into something "week", and that will be the "end" of you.

An associate of mine often approaches me with a weekly, or even sometimes daily business idea. They usually aren't get rich quick schemes, so I'll give him some credit. Maybe he'll be a millionaire someday, some of them have been promising. For the most part though we often fail to realize the sheer amount of money associated with getting a small to medium business off the ground. All that said, even smart people have dumb moments, even young people have senior moments. Here it is: The Last Supper Foundation. Last Supper was set up so we as a society would be able to feed all the homeless dogs, in dog shelters. A noble idea in and of itself. I myself was a former dog owner and have fond memories of the companionship that a dog can bring. Here's where it gets inscrutable. The dogs would be feeding on dead human bodies. What else can I say? Wow! I guess you can sign me up, I wasn't planning on doing anything else with that not-so-free time I had after I died. In our conversation, I seem to remember him saying something about it being a non-profit, for profit organization. Isn't that impossible? Maybe he was hoping somewhere deep down in his voluminous mind that he could get some sort of Government funding. Therefore not having to charge a premium price for the donantion of bodies. I'm sure families, and loved ones will be biting (no pun intended) at the chance to give away sweet ole' Grammy to Cujo. I do think this one trumps them all. I hope I haven't offended any small children in the process.

blasting: Why Can't You Be Nicer To Me? by The White Stripes

jessers

medium to bad

you feelin' ok, because
I was just wonderin'
I guess there's nothin' to
complain about. Thought I'd
do a little readin'
but couldn't concentrate
with all the bangin',
could you turn down that singin'?
I'm startin' to get a little frustrated
with the constant ringin'
of the doorbell,
what were they trying to sell?
ah! bloody hell!
it went out again,
I knew we couldn't win
no, not with that one
I wouldn't plan on Sun
keep your head up!
i'll do my best.
I forgot to tell you
they laid your Grandma
down to rest.

should I play or should I no?

(that was a play on words,(Clash) or maybe a pun, or maybe I'm trying to be punny)

I come to you faithful readers today with a heavy heart. As the sun cracks the horizon like a can of cheap beer, so we descend upon the second leg of the quarterfinals of Europe's most prestigious Cup competition, the UEFA Champions League. (alright yanks!, it's time for the real final 4 to begin,..EEwwww, you cheeky bastard.) Why the reason for the heavy heart, you ask? All this football beaming straight into your living room from another continent, a lovely woman by your side to take it all in with you, what's not to like? Well, I need to let you all in on a little secret. As most of you know, I played indoor soccer in the Fall of 2006 and suffered a career ending knee injury. Leading up to that inaugural season the lads could often been seen training at the park 1, maybe even 2 days a week. Benton "tough" Edwards as a strong defensive midfielder, Shaun "the rock" Stidham, as the Peter Crouch-esque tall center forward, to name a few. (whatever happened to that goalie of ours?) There's a few things that most of you don't realize about that tumultuous first season. 1. Man were we bad. One time we were awarded 3 points for a win due to a team not showing up, jubilent with the result we agreed to scrimage another team just for fun, we lost, big. So we loose even when we win. 2. I was being scouted by an English Soccer Academy. They offered (in secret) to take me over to Europe and allow me to train with London side, West Ham United. They saw my fitness and heading ability as 2 strong points, and wanted to develop those strengths. Well, as stated, we all know what happened next. Pop! (that pop noise was the deconstruction of hopes, dreams, aspirations, and relationships with scouts.) So like I've said, as the quarterfinals dissolve into the semi-finals, and the semi's into the final, I'll remain stateside, wife, satellite dish, and student loan debt in hand, continuing to rue the chance that I once hand of European Glory. Someone once spoke of a comeback, I've myself haven't heard that rumor yet. I'll leave you with a visual signature of myself in a different life, or, well at least pre December 2006. Cheers!

the reds go marching on, on, on!

is that spelled with one L, or 2? (pretension)

(sometimes when you go out into public, funny things happen. people want to be noticed.)(I experienced the following encounter this past weekend at the local mega-corporate-billion$$-coffee-shop-gathering-place.)(i love parenthesis's, they are mysterious.)


Hi! (loud, very loud) Welcome to _____________. (copyright purposes, sorry) What can I get started for you?

Uuhh ya,..thanks uh,...I'll have a Double, Venti, Nonfat, Skinny, Vanilla, Latte. Hold the whip.

Excellent! I'll get that going for ya. Hey Brian,....? Can you get a Double, Venti, Nonfat, Skinny, Vanilla, Latte started for,......Oh, Sir. What was your name?

Colin.

,....for Colin?

Colin. Is that with one L, or 2?

2. C-o-l-l-i-n.

(small talk ensues. Apparently these fellows know each other, or at one time were chummy, maybe this individual frequented this spot more than once.)
(insert loud steaming noise in background, and trendy world-beat music, also loud.)
(approx. 35 seconds later, drink is ready)

O.K., looks like I've got one Double, Venti, Nonfat, Skinny, Vanilla, Latte, Hold the Whip, for Collin!

Right here. Thanks. (Collin soon realizes that he's made a colossal mistake, he's told the friendly _____________ employee the wrong spelling of his name. Warm beverage in hand, he feels it necessary to explain in length his blunder)

Oh my gosh!

Is there a problem Sir?

No, it's just that I told you the wrong spelling of my name. (his voice gets slightly louder) You see, my name is actually spelled with one L. C-o-l-i-n.

Oh well,. no problem Sir, Enjoy your drink, and have a good rest of--------

---------(he's now broadcasting)ya, ya know it's just that I'm used to people asking me which program of Law school I'm in. Sorry. Ya, so I'm in the LL.M, Masters of Law program. I do this all the time, I'm so stupid. I'm always misspelling my name cause I get confused. See, people are always asking me about it, so I get used to saying "LL" a lot.

It's O.K. man, no problem.

(said law student exits___________, while I sit with grin on face, already reaching for my trusted composition notebook.)(Why,...? I think, Why did he go into that long explanation about his name and his education? Did he really forget how to spell his own name?)

So what have we learned here today? Guys, we're all great, and we all know it. Let's keep the gloating to a minimum.

jese

oh, I'm sorry: Jesse

space monkeys flying in from space.

don't think of it as an icon
think of it only as someone else
remember that one day, and one day soon the ice cream will melt
I tell you this on the outside chance that you'll
listen
too much BK makes a grown man think.,
think about the days,a nd the ways to get by.
don't listen to the reveler
he's been told once before
not to make a mockery of himself
(to)dance in public
to defend his right
I can't think of a batter way to say it
than to sing it, or bring it.
there'll always be tomorrow
didn't you teach yourself how to grow old?

who do you think?

I knew it all along,...

last night I watched La Vie En Rose and realized something that I suppose I've known all along. La Vie En Rose is a French film which chronicles the life and times and ups & downs (and just about every drop consumed) of iconic singer Edith Piaf. As far as the film itself, well as of yet, I've not totally immersed myself into the lives of popular French singers from 50 years ago, but the direction, production, art direction, and acting were brilliant. A seemingly beautiful film to look at. Marion Cotillard's performance as the singer came off as abrasive, loud and obnoxious, but that's what made it brilliant. Her best actress Oscar was unequivocally deserved. As far as this great self realization, well there was none. But I realized how emphatically affecting (and this is in any film, mind you) a scene that shows the thoughts, reactions and emotions of a crowd (from their perspective) can be (and I've figured out why). Let me break that down. Often times a director will use film within a film. How many times have we seen characters in a movie watching a movie? Trust me, it's always in there for a reason, it's full circle. But when a director turns the camera around and shows us those blank faces staring upward, lights reflecting off their absorbed disguises (is there a heavenly connotation present?), we relate. Why? Because we love film, we love the way it makes us feel, the escapism. When we see members of an audience lost in a film, we can relate to that feeling. Haven't we all been there before? There is an absolutely beautiful scene in Rose where a simple classical music piece plays over a performance by Piaf. Other than the soft music playing, the scene is totally silent. The scene juxtaposes the on stage command of Piaf with the reactions and emotions of the audience. Beautiful and moving. There have been a few other movies with similar audience interaction in them that come to mind. Francois Truffaut's 400 Blows, and Giuseppe Tornatore's Cinema Paradiso as well. I'm sure there are countless others that escape me at this time, maybe Jules and Jim. One characteristic of a truely great filmmaker is they will simply allow the audience to relate to those on the screen. Once the emotion has been evoked, the audience is more willing to trust the director later on when he introduces a gay race of space aliens from the planet zorton. Cheers!

mind ye (P)ints & (Q)uarts.

listening to right now: Where Do You Go To (My Lovely) by Peter Sarstedt

WSJD?

(what should jesse do?) I'm going to print up like all these bracelets and charge $7.95 per 10 pack of 'em. dropped off my new (used) car for service for the 2nd time this morning. I've had it for 2 weeks tomorrow. Let's be honest with each other, can we? I've got this weird unsettling feeling right now. It could be gas, but in the far reaches of my expansive mind, I mean way back there, cobwebs and all, am I in good hands? Dunno. Everyone, I mean everyone wants your money. I've said that before, I know. Maybe I should make bracelets with that on it (EIMEWYM). That would be a tad bit long. Doesn't have that ring to it. I'm trying so hard right now to not go on this diatribe about things at work. I'm not going to. Why couldn't I have been born with some sort of artistic ability that would have enabled me to be, well,..an artist? Then I could sit around all day and spend money on books and clothes and write the most rediculous stuff on a blog like ryan adams. Wait a sec, I am doing that. Well I'll still need to move to NYC though. I'm trying to hard. I'm searching for something more. Oh Deus ex Machina, wherefore art thou? Hey whaddya know?! it's,...

Ether by Gang of Four

keepin' it locked down in tha streets.

these kicks, these fads, frivolous!

so as I've previously stated I've been absorbed in my fair share of short stories, (both) fiction, creative non-fiction, and poetry recently. No, silly-willies not this roses are red shite, but words that will allow you to close your eyes and visualize exactly what the author is hoping to convey. Me being the way that I am and at times enjoying too much free time, I often feel compelled to mimic these truths that I read. Maybe I'm too easily inspired. Maybe when I grow up I'll want to do something different. I don't seem to care if it's good or not, I'm not hoping to get discovered, at least I don't think the American Poet spin off on Fox will generate much interest. If something gives you joy or a sense of purpose then my recommendation to you is to immerse yourself in it. blah-smlah, here is something.

he stands Inspired, but alone

it's the dawn of a new day
he says, a chance (his chance).
if only he could present himself
in a different way.
he stands Inspired, but alone.
6ft deep in his 10 ft. walk in closet.
stairing. he's miles away, waiting
for the shirt to make the first move.

he assumed today would be his inception,
his Kane, his first statement, hark!
he wanted everyone to hear him.
but at this moment,
he stands inspired, but alone.

she's been with him for 5 years,
married for 3.
her body still warm underneath the covers.
warm like the love they shared last night,
when their bodies crumbled into one another.
they're true to each other like rain,
like fire, but the night has ended.
he's cold, he stands Inspired, but alone.

with a weary & disinterested sigh,
he realizes the train is stopping,
stopping only for him.
also in the realm of his realization
is that his entire future is now slowly
slipping into what will soon be his past.
more than ever,
he stands Inspired, but alone.

upon his arrival he's asked
to empty his pockets.
he'll soon know why.
his belongings include, 1
japanese cigarette case, 2
cigarettes, & 3
matches. he's thinking
he should have had one
on the train. but it's too late.
his deadline is here, he's finished,
he's found out.
he stands Inspired, but alone.

w*rd $@lad.

sometimes it helps to get those random thoughts outta your mindyou know the ones that you want to share with maybe a friendor wifeor co-worker??well some people I know like to call that idea a w*rd s$@lad or itcan also be spelled word salad. likesome people I know think we arein a recession....are we in a recession? I don't think I am. what is a recession? can 303,754,195 people all be in a recession? is a recession like recess? i wonderif I spelled recess right? why am I so disinterested in politics? round table discussions often prove otherwise, but alone time picking out fruit doesn't. didyou know that a toothbrush was slash is 6bucks? i do not match in my clothes todayI have on brown shoes andblack pants and adark navy blue sweater witha gang of four button on. theyare an english punk bandfrom the 70's,very influential.neo-Marxist.the guy who took some $$ from me at the carplace said he was going to check themout, he even wrote the bands name downona piece of paper. he's not goingto check them out. trust me. he just wanted my money. iam nervous today because the soccer team that ilike hasan important game in a different country and i hope they do good. i am an american who likes a team from a large city in england with players that are probably over half not from england themselves and are playing a game against mostly italians but some frenchguys and other europeans. i guessyou could call me a man of the world. bukowski was an absolute monsterin real life. i wonder why i likehim so much.? i mean he beat women and screwed alot of them and drank himself intoan utter oblivion. all things I dont agree with,but he writes beautiful words quite unlike this, surely you dont have to do all those things tobe a good writer,causei'll nnever be a good writer then. wait a second, am i even a writer? aahh man, probably not. i'm listening to opera right now, i don't know why but i like it. the guy who was in a play that Iwent to see a few weekes ago almost hit me in my car yesterday. it was ironic cause i had just rented a movie called la vie en rose,so maybe he was subconsciously mad at me. if theres one thing i can never confess its that i cant dance a single step. if youre a man and are at work, and are not liking it then repeat after me, Yes! Let us manipulate this corp-bull-shi-system and make loads of money for our wives and stomachs. let us dream of vacating our current lot of affairs and rescue that damsel in duress. (OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHH) its teatime.