lemon yellow sun-
i just heard your
name for the one
& only first time
in my life! will you
show & tell us your
intentions with my
daughter? - how
long since our
last magnetic
morning encounter?
can you breathe
your last warm breath
on someone else's cheek?
good girl, though I'll not
forget how afraid you've
been- shaken & inept.
defeated by a silent
white witch, with a shrill
for a voice, & a hammer
for a face. you ugly bitch-
you'll never out last
the everlasting light.
though your attempts
will be seen as futile,
you'll return on & off
like a transient hobo -
confused & wandering
the streets with abashed
ambitions. like a horny
suitor, we'll await your
announcements as all
mankind twiddles away
into a vast chasm of doubt

(monumental) NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

God: when I prayed for your fury to be cast down upon the sinners & the evil, I meant for you to get me outta a day of work, & not destroy my one prize possession - what have I done?

I do apologize for being rude to that customer service rep., but hey, she wasn't offering me any help.

Readers: don't you worry about me, I've got Bolano to keep me occupied & it could always be worse, at least we haven't lost power/internet/our minds/- & watch out for those falling icicles-

But this Savage D book - man!!- (thanks to benton for the recommends) only just cracking the surface, but this is looking to be a likely lad huge! pick, & just a brilliant read- the way it flows, the style- i mean i am quickly in this time & place & this mindset, i totally get it-

are you all staying safe & warm today? has anyone seen someone fall yet? that is something that will always be funny to me, no matter how old or mature i get- when someone eats it hard, come on, let's face it, it's funny- do i even have to say, "as long as they don't get hurt"?

ok top 5 winter snow/ice fest-your satellite is out- albums to drink coffee/workout/sleep/blog/read/write to - ( in no particular order) - this is going to be tough-

1.Radiohead - Kid A
2.The Smiths - Meat is Murder
3. Rolling Stones - Sticky Fingers
4. Neil Young - Live at Massey Hall 1971
5. (tie) - Miles Davis - Kind of Blue & Jay-Z - The Blueprint

Cheers - don't slip

an effortless statement,.

your delicate beauty tames my virility,
like formed porcelain or an ethereal wind.
to look upon you from afar calms my fears
& soothes my anxious occasions - your eyes
are alluring & equable like a beacon of light
cast to a myriad of hosts. ignite in me a flicker
of hope as I transverse a mystic destination.

Ask God to grant impervious passage until
we embrace again.

on late friday nights before my rest,..

..I often have dreams, & in my reverie there's this incessant
tic,
tic,
tic &
boom,
boom,
boom
& a bang!
& quite possibly a high-hat rhythm
& it all concludes to some form of electronic music, followed by 3 off beats, proceeded by a low hum that seems to last for an eternity -

but before that music taps out, I'm totally aware of all my surroundings - an acquainted environment - I'm all alone in a big city, not sure which one, not Chicago, definitely not Boston, but possibly Brooklyn - equal parts birds-eye view & broken side streets mixed with a dash of paths of glory - so in this vision I seemingly awake each day to a bright & unique light, one that sheds my previous days skin, one to heat my morning coffee, & most importantly, one that reliably paves a path to an unrealistic village green 25 minutes down from my heart beating desires.

each day around noontime, I follow this aisle to my meaningful end, my attendance to this park serves as my only purpose in this surreal state - a passage to discovery - the low fuzz of a synthesized beat pulsates not only in my head, but seems to amalgamate my soul directly to the bright & unique light that seeks my heart everyday -

with a new movement in my hand I wonder the pages of purpose in my life; it may be Chilean or French, American or Brooklyn's 2nd son but these moments equate to pure simplistic bliss that my mind easily recognizes - & during these sessions, one fleeting second can pass & I breathe in & listen & sense relief & I spread my arms out to my sides like an eagle & there's that bright & unique light still shining down on my forehead & I'm still alone in that second, & nothing can distract me, nothing can pull me away from this moment - the music has stopped & I'm free to just live, & I suppose just be - my only purpose now is to simply exist, right there at that very spot of earth - & no matter what, nothing can take that away - outside sources be damned - you'll never win - you'll never beat this moment -

after my moment with the fates, I soon realize that I've become someone, or something totally different - I soon figure out that I've become just an idea of an alternate reality - still aware of my surroundings but now relegated to my fate - & in comes a new sound to my perception - it's harsh & slightly indescribable - something like the evening news or maybe a DJ from an overly popular radio station - those words - the delivery - the draw - that over compensation - but all bubble wrapped & presented straight to me with not a thought of my feelings or choices or even preferences for that matter -

dire & alone I begin my slow & daunting walk past vagrancies of all sorts to find my resting place again & hope beyond hope that I'll experience even the most modest form of temporary bliss that I've just come from, when I awake again - my path now leads down a different road, one of deli shops with the stinging sun raging down upon me - I'm back to a realistic state, smelling only street & the sweat that now forms upon my brow -as I begin the long, final ascent up to my bed, I slowly discard my clothes - one peice at a time the individual articles find a resting place on different steps of stairs I idlely climb - I crawl into bed attempting the inevitable; to lie naked & alone - no body lying next to me to calm my anxiety - no warm being in arms reach to soothe my passion & desires - I soon sink away yet again, eagerly waiting with a child-like anticipation for future possibilities of pace & youth &spirit - romance & illusion are all that escape me - I've tripped, the dream is over.

in case you missed it,...

Obamas Full Inauguration Speech - ABC News

last night (pt. whatever,..) (far more pop.in europe than stateside)

kings of leon.
louisville palace.

one time lo-fi southern garage buzz band kings of leon extend sound into strat-mosphere (made up word) of arena rock gods without losing their cool, & subsequently melt local wanna-be writer/blogger whiz kid's face off with screeching blues vocals & equally screeching guitar lighting bolts,.......

but ya, they are way more talented than i ever thought, unbelievable sound coming from band (most notably from the last 2 albums) made up of 3 bros & a cousin.

all is well that ends well, (except for fight in aisle & lesbian lovers making said love right in front)

but whatever,......

for those still interested,......(new developments)

in the on going Kaka' saga, it looks like the deal is dead in the (English) water.

Reports coming from Milan state Kaka' himself "listened to his heart", Kaka also told AC Milan TV that he had prayed to God for an answer, stating: ''I believe I have made the right choice. To have gone to Manchester City could have been a great project but in the past few days I have prayed a lot to understand what the right team would be and in the end I have decided to remain here".

So much for a world record transfer fee.....

However, new develops this morning from Manchester: Potential Kaka' teammate at City & fellow Brazilian Robinho (oddly enough, Robinho holds the British transfer record at £32.5million) has stormed out of the teams training facilties due to his disatisfaction with the club over not signing Kaka'. So, what's worse than not signing a great Brazilian footballer to your team?

Losing the great Brazilian that you already have! Even though Manchester City is a huge cross town rival to United, I'm starting to feel a little sorry for them. They're the richest club in the world, & nothing seems to be going their way,...hey, money isn't everything right?

just so you know the insanity,....

a (possible) deal is about to go down between 2 clubs in European football, one from Italy & one from England. Italian giants AC Milan could very well part ways with 2007 footballer of the year & Brazilian play maker Ricardo Izecson dos Santos Leite, aka Kaka' when they accept a bid from (bottom half of the table) Manchester City. (I'm going to make you an offer you can't refuse)

The Citizens (backed by the Al-Nahyan family; an oil-rich, royal Arab family from Abu Dhabi) are set to bid upwards of £100million (that's over $200 million my American friends) for the 26 year old midfielder. The father of Kaka' (Papa Kaka', no relation to Papa Seki) is expected in Italy for talks & clarification on the deal.

Also rumored in the deal is a possible weekly salary somewhere in the stratosphere of £500,000 (that's over $1 million per week). Again, this is a team who currently sits 11th out of 20 in the Barclays Premier League standings. So much for mid-table mediocrity, right? It's all about ambition.

To put this a little more into perspective, the long standing transfer fee record came in 2001 for French maestro Zinedine Zidane. The then record fee was paid in full by Spanish side Real Madrid to the "old lady" of Italian football, Juventus. The fee still stands today at £46 million. (Yes, it was Zidane who most Americans remember for his infamous headbutt to Marco Materazzi during the final of the 2006 World Cup, his last game.)

But that £46 million record is set to blow away with the wind if City get their way & the blue half of Manchester should have the instant spark they so desperately need to find their way into the top half of the table & a possible UEFA Cup spot for next year.

Here's to the last fortnight of the 2009 January transfer window,......enjoy the insanity of it all.

first class mate, first class,...(expression of approval)

this is acclaim for you - total unrequited bliss - no pay backs -you don't owe me a damn thing - it's all out there in the open now - (shit, did you spill coffee on the couch? oohhhh nnooo) but numb,......on down the line - to the bottom of your calves - eyes closed to reach instant gratification - a moment's preparation - a sinking feeling that never bottoms out - just keeps rising to the breaking point - to find separation from mind & body - bubble up & explode - then go for a curry - bring yourself down - with a cracking paperback - with that smell - like 70's library - old man - 4th grade teacher -remember the furry carpet? - to transcend boundaries with explicit queries - to re-write history with a sense of urgency - & what's with the moon lately? - praise from multiple sources - to a lingering hero - to loiter above my caffeinated head - always watching - ever aware - like a staunch father figure - that Eastwood snarl - but in the end - acknowledgment.

United steam roll into 2nd in the premier league as they win their 1st of 2 games they have in hand over their competition while Jodie Meeks tanks Tennessee for 54, thus securing a new school record for most points scored in a game for Kentucky; it's been an interesting week in sport, & I remain miserable, why is this?

Stay strong in your pursuits today.

With love & devotion to you,...

proper dark & moody pt. 2 (have you called your social worker today?)

well, not so much dark as a little moody, but Scottish-moody can be dark, right? raise your hand if you've heard of Glasvegas - ?? Anyone, ? well you should, even if you hate them, which you may, but you should at least give them a shot. I'm officially going around in circles.


(tickets 4pounds)

I'm still not even sure what I think about them. But I want to marry lead singer James Allan's thick Scottish slur, it's intoxicating. (Allan also boasts an uncanny resemblance to my late hero Joe Strummer.) (He's pictured on the right.)

But this huge sound! Like massive, heart-wrenching, dream-pop, shoegazer, pub situation,.....see for yourself.

take 2

gettin' my scary rave-beat on. (& ya don't stop.)
all the way through,...no cheating.

oh ya, & you should have just seen what the best
footballer in the world just did,......
the magician, the wizard, little lionel.

on long, gray afternoons-
when to hide away
from misplaced society
& relive football feelings
& dream of love & diner
dinners with Rita Hayworth,..
hot plates & warm
coffee, & a dawn to wonder
where we went wrong.
when together started the
status quo. it's then to
search for words to cleanse
desires. fancy, lavish
& extreme in delivery.
to place an angry fist over my
heart, if only for a moment
to feel a cruel man's motive.
& should you choose solitude,
i'll awaken you still with
unsparing love, each morning
with the mist & dogs, lest
your memory fade from
reminders. is to give in to
what so many crave a
mountain to tall for you
to climb? can one reach
the summit all alone?
to deny what arrives with
a natural announcement
is your aberration.

i'll have the vegetable pad thai & a guinness, a pint thereof.

take a poke at some tracks from the first couple'a really great albums of 2009. i've been dancing while sitting down on my couch listening to My Girls for the last 5 minutes. (& it just took Valencia 59 seconds to break down Villarreal, 1-nil.) but the rest of Merriweather Post Pavilion is very Beach Boys, at least in the vocalization, interesting.

(geez, 2-nil after 9 minutes)

Noble Beast is full of crisp instrumentation & beautiful flowing lyrics. Another brilliant effort from Andrew Bird.

*

even heroes have bad days, right?

some photos are amazing. they speak volumes about what's going on in a particular situation. if captured in the right manner, an outsider can immediately feel the agony or ecstasy on display. take this example for proof; manchester united (champions of england, europe & the world) traveled to Derby County, (pronounced "darby", not derby as we know it in, "kentucky derby") a team 35 spots & 1 division away from united in the 2nd division coca-cola championship, on wednesday night for the 1st of a 2 leg semi-final & were defeated by the lowly club 1-0. trust me, the picture speaks volumes more than i ever could.

http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg117/jchu02/rooney.jpg

it's basically an album that you can curl up with & sink away,...(proper dark & moody)

was talking about Radiohead's Amnesiac the other day & remembered what a, hhmm, I won't say masterpiece, because I know sometimes I throw that word around too much, but just how unreal that album was, & still is. But it got me to thinking that for the most part, that sound is really how I know Radiohead, or should I say how I got to know them. Amnesiac was the first album of theirs that I bought in 2001. Of course I went backwards after that, but it made for an interesting experiment in the evolution of a group that I so relate to. Put Pablo Honey on & then Amnesiac, or even Kid A for that matter & I swear to you you'll understand what I'm saying.

talk about atmosphere & creating a mood, Amnesiac was my security blanket for the first month or so after I bought it. I listened to it every night & it allowed me (& still does) to find that "away" place that I was looking for. I immediately got it. Sometimes a true masterpiece like OK Computer takes some time to take a hold of you & thus has a different effect. Not negative or lesser, but diverse. I relate to every song, idea, mood, & even the artwork that the album displays.

do you ever feel like this in your life? pt. 2

but brilliant pages of imagination.
I told you, didn't I?
I swear to you, not for the faint of heart.
Proper lock up your children situation.
but totally relevant to the subject matter,
end of the world situation, uncertainty,
survival of the smartest & most lethal.

"by removing the head, or destroying the brain"

quick 2009 resolution situation

attempting to re-discover love & devotion to certain medium, beautiful pages of art & devotion, comic book combination, (don't ever lose your innocence chula.)

The Walking Dead & Invincible have been away from my life for far too long, brilliant modern gems, must find passion for these pages. & then whatever else bro's dish to me. (this serves as my official reminder to myself, hold me to it Jesse) (OK, I'll try)

R.I.P. 2 week holiday - a lament

thanks for the good times,
we accomplished so much together,
remember all the things we discovered?
I'll never forget you, I do love you,
you were beautiful, in your own special way.
thanks for making me remember certain things.

remember that one time we,....?

oh ya, that will be unforgettable!

you are loved & will always be close to me.
my heart & mind will graciously anticipate
our next revival - it won't come soon enough.
I guess this is our final farewell, our goodbye
to a peaceful time, remember to think of me
when lions roar.

i'll be around.

ok, ok, ok,......here it is,...geez.

I've worked very hard for you, see.

2008 didn't quite live up to the year 2007 did in films, but that's not to say that there wasn't some great movies to experience this past year. most of the obvious "big ones" did in fact make my top ten list, but I think you'll see a few surprises as well. without further ado, here are my 10 favorite films of 2008 & as always, enjoy, or don't,......

but first a few honorable mentions - (these films were fantastic in one way or another)

In Bruges - This Martin McDonagh-directed gem sees Colin Farrell & Brendon Gleeson as hit men holed up in Bruges, Belgium as they contemplate life, mingle with a dwarf & dutch prostitutes, & avoid "all things mob boss", played brilliantly by RalphFiennes. "Shoot first, Sight see later"

WALL-E - If you didn't see this film, well you should have. It's every bit as amazing as you've heard. WALL-E is a compassionate film that is entertaining, responsible, appealing & visually stunning. Pixar has indeed done it again.

Iron Man - Explosions, Action, Robert Downey Jr - Period!

#10. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull - Just one of quite a few franchises that were back in action in 2008, Spielberg delivers with a Jones right hook in this 4th installment in the series. Loaded with action & adventure just as Raiders was all the way back in 1981, Kingdom doesn't disappoint. Newcomer to the franchise Shia LaBeouf proves his worth & is poised to carry on the series when legend Harrison Ford gives it up.



#9. Slumdog Millionaire - Master director Danny Boyle (Trainspotting, 28 Days Later, Sunshine) takes a brave step forward in this intimate film about the life of a boy growing up in the slums of Mumbai, India. The protagonist Jamal Malik, 18, is experiencing the biggest day of his life as he is one question away from winning 20 million rupees on India's version of "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?". Boyle displays a mastery of his craft by intricately weaving multiple flashbacks of Jamal's life throughout his childhood, each flashback in his life yields an answer to one of the shows questions. The heart of the movie is revealed as one central character in Jamal's life continually shows up & explains that she is the one girl that Jamal has loved & lost.



#8. The Fall - For this, we must take a dip: Original review

#7. Quantum of Solace - The 22nd(?) installment in the James Bond series saw a shift in direction from recent formulaic installments. Solace was for me a breath of fresh air, & that's not to say that I don't also enjoy many of the other Bond films. This film for me was just a sleek & trim action film, much in the same vein as the Bourne films. For further discover on this topic, please visit the expert: ROBTRAIN



#6. Vicky Cristina Barcelona - easily one of my favorite directors of all time, Woody Allen is starting to make a habit of making really good films on into his 5th decade of film making. Vicky tells the tale of 2 girlfriends who spend a summer in Barcelona pursuing all things art, music & wine, only to fall in love with the same painter played by Javier Bardem. Little do they know that the volatile ex-wife of the painter is about to re-enter the picture. This film will appeal slightly more to the art house crowd, great cast as well that also includes Scarlet Johansson, Penelope Cruz & Rebecca Hall.



#5. Burn After Reading - the Coen Bros. were back in 2008 after an amazing year in 2007 with another brilliant film. Burn After Reading is one of those funny, intelligent & brilliantly directed films that seems to have everything, & everyone in it. A disc with the memoirs of a CIA agent played by John Malkovich is found by 2 goofy gym employees (Brad Pitt & Frances McDormand) who attempt to extort the recently un-employed agent out of money if he ever wants it back. Chaos ensues as the agents' wife (Tilda Swinton) has an affair with a State Department Marshall played by George Clooney & all roads lead back to the residence of Malkovich's character Osbourne Cox for a discordant finale.



#4. Snow Angels - Director David Gordon Green adds a powerful drama to his CV as Snow Angels takes an in-depth look at the life of a teenager (Michael Angarano), the break up of his parents & his one-time babysitter (Kate Beckinsale) & her marital problems. Set in a modest, snow-covered Pennsylvania town, Green interweaves multiple story lines to tell a realistic, depressing, but altogether power story about relationships, separation & tragedy. (Originally a limited release in 2007)



#3. The Strangers - The single most un-settling, horrific & intense film I have seen in recent memory, The Strangers tells the story of a young couple returning to a vacation house only to be terrorized by 3 unknown assilants with masks on throughout the night. Mood & style are what makes The Strangers a brilliant film & the psychological terror that our protagonists experience is sure to leave a lasting mark on anyone who views the film. Strong performances by Liv Tyler & Scott Speedman make the terror believable. Simply terrifying.



#2. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - Director David Fincher adds another brilliant film to his long list of greats (Zodiac, Fight Club, Panic Room, Se7en) in this film adapted from a short story by F.Scott Fitzgerald. Button tells the tale of a man born into his 80's & subsequently ages backwards. Button plays out like a grand, almost 3 hour film that you don't want to end, as we follow Benjamin from the end of WW1 to the 21st century meeting many different people & making many discoveries along the way. Ultimately the film is about the joys that life brings, & also the sadness that death bestows upon all of us.



#1. The Dark Knight - Back is director Christopher Nolan & star Christian Bale in the 2nd installment of this new Batman series. But more important than return players was the intoroduction into the series (one of the all time great film performances) of the late Heath Ledger as The Joker. Again drawing from a masterful cast, Nolan weaves another brilliant gem of crime & action in Gotham City. With the help of Lt. Gordon & DA Harvey Dent, Batman sets out once again to rid the city of crime & bring hope in an otherwise dark world. This film is every bit as amazing as you've heard, from the opening bank heist, to the introduction of The Joker, & Two-Face. It's all here.

insomnia pages

last night
flipped insomnia
pages. tossed
& learned.
read all
too familiar
story. The
story: deep
& dreaming,
but aware.
au courant.
a state of
consciousness
a dream
called "she".
one in
which the
time that
we are
given has
all but
betrayed us.
one in
which the
scroll of
Love has
all but
unraveled. one
to re-live
past failings.
searched for
answers in
insomnia pages.
found nothing
but heartbreak
& dead thoughts.
was lonely
in dark
places. eyes
open to
see reflections
& faces.
faces of
ghosts, looking
for answers,
reflections of
self in
dark locations.
cowering away
in blackest night.
these pages,
a series in
which one
cannot put
down, a
clinging drug,
a haunting
of the mind,
a quick grasp
for air.
a vigil
to slow
time. time
now waits
for pages
to learn &
reveal again
when brightness
ends.

yes, I am a cynic,....who told you otherwise?

it's the best way to be -

have you heard of my blog?
have any of your dreams come true thus-far?
what are your hopes/desires?
have you contacted your social worker yet?

are you a company man?

words i hate (some)
marketing
investment
finance
tracking
success
"you can do it"
sales
budget
initiative

so on & so forth -
more later -
must analyze my portfolio, 401K, & douche bag.

& oh! did I forget just 2, simply 2 bequeaths to members only jacket-wearing family?

(M)oneypenny - you can have my uncharacteristically witty quips, you can smirk at the man, my wry outlook on life, & last but not least, my wonderful, hairy beard,....it's yours to keep, do with it what you will!

king tut- my ninja infiltration skills, any remaining peanut butter or dark chocolate left at my residence, & (one of my prize possessions) my DIRECTV dish, for all things SETANTA, FSC, & GOLTV, retain the passion of the motherland, don't be sucked into the over-whelming hype of American sports. Never, & I mean never!, apologize for your dedication/devotion to your club & national team of choice.

the Ricky Gervais vehicle Ghost Town awaits,....